How to pray for unbelievers: Praying for people to come to Christ
Want to know how to pray for unbelievers - perhaps a family member or friend you've been worried about for years - but not sure what to say? Praying for unbelievers simply means bringing real people before God by name: asking Him to draw them to Jesus, open their eyes to the gospel, and give you opportunities to love them and speak. You don't need eloquent words. God already knows them and loves them more than you do.
If we say we love people, we should bring them before God. Before we speak to people about Jesus, we should be willing to speak to God about them.
This page gives you a simple pattern for praying specifically, example prayers for the salvation of a loved one and for people you've just met, the Bible passages that shape these prayers, and a 30-day challenge to put it into practice.
"Father, You know and love [name] even more than I do. Please draw them to Jesus. Open their eyes to see who He really is, and soften their heart toward You. Give me patience to love them well, wisdom to know when to speak, and courage when the moment comes. I trust them into Your hands. In Jesus' name, amen."
Why should I pray for people who don't know Jesus?
Prayer is not a technique for becoming better at evangelism, nor is it a way of trying to make God do what we want. It is an expression of love, dependence and trust. When we pray for people, we acknowledge that God knows them, loves them and is able to work in their lives in ways we never could.
Jesus looked at the crowds and had compassion on them. He then told His disciples to pray for workers. Prayer isn't an alternative to mission where we sit on the sidelines. Prayer prepares us to participate in mission.
And prayer doesn't only prepare others. It prepares us. As we regularly bring people before God, He can change the way we see them. Fear can give way to compassion. Indifference can become love. Anxiety can become dependence. We begin to notice opportunities to serve, listen and speak.
The goal isn't to become better evangelists. The goal is to become more like Jesus - people who love others enough to bring them before God, depend on the Holy Spirit, and are ready to obey when He opens a door.
That obedience can look different in different situations.
Sometimes God gives us opportunities to share Jesus with people we already know. A conversation with a family member, friend, neighbor or colleague may develop over months or years. We may listen to their story, serve them, answer their questions and gradually have opportunities to explain why we follow Jesus.
At other times, evangelism begins with someone we have never met. We may intentionally go into a public place to talk with people about Jesus, join an evangelism team, speak to someone we meet during our day, or simply start a conversation with a stranger.
Relational evangelism and street evangelism are both valid expressions of the same calling: to make Jesus known.
The method may be different. The dependence on God is the same.
Prayer prepares us to share the gospel
Paul begins Colossians 4:2–6 with a simple command, "Continue steadfastly in prayer." He is speaking to ordinary believers about how they are to live and how they are to relate to people who do not yet follow Christ. Prayer comes first. We can easily think that preparing to share Jesus means learning what to say, becoming more confident, or finding the right opportunity. Those things have their place, but Paul begins somewhere deeper - dependence on God.
Prayer prepares the disciple before it prepares the conversation.
When we regularly bring people before God, He also works on our own hearts. We may pray for someone to come to know Jesus and realize that we don't actually love them very much. We may ask God to open a door and discover that we are more afraid of rejection than concerned about the person. We may pray for courage and realize that we have been relying on our own ability.
Prayer brings these things into the light.
This is part of authentic discipleship. Evangelism is not something we add to Christianity after we have learned enough information. It flows from becoming like Jesus. Jesus saw people. He had compassion on them. He listened to them. He served them. He spoke truth to them. He called them to follow Him. If we are becoming like Jesus, we should increasingly see people as He sees them.
Sometimes becoming like Jesus will mean patiently loving someone we have known for years.
Sometimes it will mean having the courage to approach someone we have never met.
Both require the same heart: love for people, dependence on God and a willingness to obey.
So before asking God to change someone else, allow Him to change you. Ask yourself:
- Do I genuinely care about the people around me?
- Do I love people who disagree with me?
- Am I more concerned about rejection from people, rather than obedience to God?
- Am I depending on my personality or ability?
- Am I willing to listen before I speak?
- Am I willing to initiate a conversation when an opportunity arises?
- Am I willing to patiently invest in a relationship when that is what the situation requires?
- Am I willing to step outside my comfort zone for the sake of making Jesus known?
Colossians 4 also tells us to be watchful in prayer. That means we don't simply pray and then forget. We pay attention. We watch for what God may be doing.
For someone we know, this might mean noticing a change in their circumstances, a question they ask, a struggle they share or a moment when they become more open to spiritual things.
For someone we have just met, it might mean noticing an opportunity to introduce yourself, ask a question, listen to their story or offer to pray for them.
Ask the Holy Spirit to make you attentive to people, sensitive to opportunities and willing to obey. Don't only pray, "Holy Spirit, help me evangelize." Pray instead, "Holy Spirit, make me more like Jesus as I encounter this person." Ask Him for love, patience, gentleness, wisdom, courage and self-control. Ask Him to expose selfish motives and replace them with genuine compassion.
Prayer prepares us because God is not only working through us. He is working in us.
How do I pray for the salvation of a loved one?
Colossians 4:2–6 shows us that prayer is connected to the mission of God's people. Paul asks believers to pray for an open door for the message about Christ and for the ability to make it clear.
Prayer is not a way of controlling people or persuading God to do what we want. We are not praying, “God, make this person become a Christian because I want them to.” We are bringing them before the God who already knows them, loves them and calls people to Himself. Paul gives us a beautiful example in Romans 10:1. He says that his heart's desire and prayer to God for Israel is "that they may be saved."
Notice how personal that is.
Paul does not speak about evangelism as an abstract idea. He has a deep desire for real people to know God. (If you've ever wondered why it matters so much, see could a loving God send good people to hell?) Who are the people whose salvation you regularly bring before God? Some will be people you know well. Your family. Your friends. Your neighbors. Your colleagues. Others may be people you have encountered only briefly. Perhaps someone you spoke with on the street, someone you met at an event, someone you prayed with or someone whose story stayed with you after a conversation.
Bring actual people before God. Paul's instruction in 1 Timothy 2:1–6 widens our prayer even further. God's people are to pray for all kinds of people, because God "wants all people to be saved and to come to the knowledge of the truth" (1 Tim 2:4; see also what happens to people who never heard the gospel?). Our prayers should not be limited to those who are easy to love or already sympathetic to us.
Jesus also shows us this pattern. In John 17, He prays for His disciples and for those who will believe through their message. Prayer and mission are already connected in the ministry of Jesus. We are not inventing a strategy - we are following Jesus. And there is an important balance here. We should never assume that if someone does not become a Christian, we simply failed to pray enough. Scripture does not give us that burden. Salvation belongs to God.
Our responsibility is faithfulness. We pray. We love. We serve. We speak when God gives opportunity. Sometimes we intentionally create opportunities to speak. We trust Him with the outcome. That takes pressure off us without making us passive.
Pray for your family. Pray for your friends. Pray for your neighbors and colleagues. Pray for people you meet regularly. Pray for people you encounter briefly. Pray for people you meet when you intentionally go out to share Jesus. Pray for people who are difficult to love. Pray for people who oppose Christ.
And pray for more than their circumstances. Pray that they would come to know Jesus. Pray that they would understand the truth. Pray that God would place faithful Christians around them. Pray that God would open their hearts to the gospel. Pray that you would know how to love them well. Then leave them in God's hands.
A praying disciple learns to say, “Father, this person belongs in Your hands. Help me love them faithfully, and show me how I can participate in what You are doing.”
What should I pray for an unbeliever? A simple pattern
Pray for people can sound good while remaining very vague.
Colossians 4:2–6 gives us something more concrete. Paul asks believers to pray for an open door for the message of Christ, and for the ability to make that message clear. That gives us a very practical place to begin.
Know who you are praying for. Bring actual people before God rather than only praying in generalities. That might be someone you have known for years:
"Father, please draw Sarah to Jesus. Help her see who He really is. Give me opportunities to love her with Your patience and deep understanding. Open a door for me to speak with her. Give me wisdom to know when to listen and when to speak. Give me courage when the opportunity comes."
Or it might be someone you have only just met:
"Father, thank You for the opportunity to meet this person. You know their story and what they are carrying. Help me see them as You see them. Give me courage to start a conversation, wisdom to know what to ask and sensitivity to know how to speak about Jesus. If there is an opportunity to share the gospel, help me recognize it and respond faithfully."
That is not a formula - it is simply an example of specific prayer.
Here is a simple pattern you can use.
Pray for their heart to be open to Christ
Ask God to draw them to Himself and help them see their need for Christ.
"Lord, draw this person to Yourself."
Pray for their circumstances
Ask God to work through the ordinary events of their life.
"Lord, use the people and circumstances around them to turn their attention toward You."
Pray for them to understand the gospel
Pray that they would understand who Jesus is, what He has done and what it means to follow Him.
"Help them see Jesus clearly."
If you'd like to be ready for the questions that may follow, see what must I do to be saved?
Pray for opportunities to share the gospel
This is directly connected to Colossians 4.
"Lord, open a door for me to speak about Jesus."
Sometimes that open door will develop through an existing relationship. Sometimes it will be a conversation with someone you have never met.
Be ready for either.
Pray for boldness and wisdom
Ask God to make you the kind of disciple who can be trusted with the opportunity.
"Give me love, courage, wisdom and humility."
Pray for other Christians who are sharing the gospel
You are not the only person God can use.
"Show me who else could encourage, serve or help this person."
This is particularly important when evangelism happens through relationships. We do not need to become the only Christian in someone's life.
It is also important when evangelism happens through teams. One person may start a conversation, another may answer a question, another may pray with the person, and another may continue the relationship afterwards.
Pray for God's will
This keeps the prayer centered on God rather than our desired result.
"Father, let Your will be done in this person's life."
Specific prayer also helps us notice what God may be doing.
If you have prayed for someone you know for several weeks, you may begin to notice changes you previously overlooked. A question they ask. Something they share. An unexpected conversation. A struggle. An opportunity to serve.
If you are intentionally going out to share Jesus, prayer can make you equally attentive. You may notice someone who seems open to conversation, someone who is hurting, someone who asks a spiritual question or someone who simply needs someone to listen.
Colossians says to be watchful in prayer. So don't just pray and move on. Pray. Watch. Listen. Be ready.
Prayer is not a system for producing evangelistic results. We bring people before God because we love them. We ask Him to work because we cannot change hearts. We ask for open doors because He knows what we cannot see. And we ask for wisdom because we want to faithfully participate when He gives us an opportunity.
Prayer becomes personal when people become personal.
What if I don't know what to say? Depending on God in evangelism
There are two easy mistakes we can make when it comes to sharing Jesus.
One is passivity - "God saves people, so there is nothing I need to do." The other is self-reliance, "It is up to me to convince this person." The New Testament gives us neither.
Colossians 4:2–6 gives us a better way. Paul tells believers to devote themselves to prayer, to ask God for open doors, and to pray that the message would be made clear. Then he tells them to walk wisely and speak graciously. Prayer and action belong together.
We pray because we depend on God. Then we obey because He has called us to participate. Acts 4:23–31 gives us a powerful picture of this. The believers had been threatened. They gathered together and prayed. But they did not mainly ask God to make their lives easier or remove every danger - they asked Him for boldness to speak His word. Then the Holy Spirit empowered them.
That is an important pattern for discipleship:
Prayer → dependence → courage → obedience.
And the Holy Spirit joins us in that prayer. Romans 8:26–27 tells us that "the Spirit helps us in our weakness" - when we don't know how to pray for someone as we ought, the Spirit Himself intercedes. You are not alone as you bring someone before God. The Spirit who knows their heart is already praying alongside you.
We don't pray because we are trying to avoid action. We pray so that we can faithfully act.
Paul asks believers to pray for him so that he would be given the words and boldness to make the gospel known. Think about that…
Paul was already an apostle. He knew the gospel. He had preached before. Yet he still asked other Christians to pray that he would have courage and the right words.
So you do not need to wait until you feel completely confident. You can ask God for help even now. You can say, "Father, I don't know what to say. Please give me wisdom. Holy Spirit, give me courage. Jesus, help me represent You well." Then step forward. This is where dependence becomes obedience.
The opportunity may be as simple as listening to someone who is hurting, answering a question about your faith or explaining why you follow Jesus. It may mean having a conversation with someone you have known for years. It may mean intentionally approaching someone you have never met and asking if you can talk with them. It may mean praying with someone in a public place, sharing your testimony with a stranger, or joining other Christians who are going out specifically to share the gospel. The approach may be different, but the dependence is the same.
You don't have to control the conversation or produce a particular response. You don't have to save anyone. You just need to be faithful. Colossians says to walk in wisdom toward outsiders and to let our speech be gracious. That means dependence on God should affect not only whether we speak, but how we live and speak. Ask the Holy Spirit to help you listen well, speak truthfully, love sincerely and remain courageous when you feel uncomfortable. The outcome belongs to God. The obedience belongs to us.
How do I move from praying for someone to talking about Jesus?
Prayer changes what we notice. When you pray for people consistently, you begin to see them differently. A colleague becomes someone you are asking God to draw to Jesus. A neighbor becomes someone you are learning to love. A friend becomes someone whose questions, struggles and hopes you are paying attention to. Someone you meet for the first time becomes more than a stranger. They become a person created in God's image, someone Jesus loves and someone you have an opportunity to serve. This changes how we approach evangelism.
Sometimes the next step is to patiently invest in a relationship. We listen, serve, ask questions, share our lives and look for opportunities to talk about Jesus.
Sometimes the next step is to initiate a conversation. We may meet someone in a park, on the street, at a university, at work, on public transport or somewhere else in our ordinary lives. We may never see that person again, so the opportunity to speak about Jesus may be immediate.
Neither approach is more spiritual than the other.
Relational evangelism and intentional evangelism are both valuable ways of making Jesus known. We should be willing to do both. We should be willing to patiently build relationships, and we should be willing to initiate conversations. We should be willing to listen for months, and we should be willing to speak when an unexpected opportunity comes.
We should be willing to go where people are and intentionally make ourselves available for gospel conversations, and we should be willing to faithfully represent Jesus among the people God has already placed around us. Prayer helps us do all of this with the right heart.
Not to become better at getting people to listen to us, but to become people who are awake to what God is doing around us.
Put your prayers into practice: A 30-day challenge
Choose ten people who do not currently follow Jesus. They might include family members, friends, neighbors, colleagues, people you regularly encounter, or people you have recently met.
Write their names down where possible and commit to praying for them consistently for 30 days.
Pray specifically. Ask God to draw them to Jesus, help them understand the gospel and see Jesus clearly, work through their circumstances, surround them with faithful Christians and open opportunities for you or others to love and serve them.
Pray for yourself too:
"Lord, make me someone who genuinely loves this person. Give me wisdom to know when to listen, when to speak and what to say."
Then watch.
Pay attention to questions, struggles, conversations and opportunities you might normally overlook. If you are developing relationships, look for opportunities to serve, listen and speak about Jesus. If you are intentionally going out to share Jesus, ask God to help you see people who are open to conversation and give you courage to approach them.
You might also join with other Christians and intentionally spend time in a place where you can meet people and have gospel conversations. Pray together before you go. Ask God for compassion, wisdom and boldness. Then go, talk to people, listen to their stories and look for opportunities to make Jesus known.
Write down what you notice.
You are learning to recognize where God may be giving you an opportunity to love, serve, listen, speak or initiate a conversation.
Do you pray for courage to share Jesus, or do you quietly hope the opportunity never comes?
Are you more concerned about being rejected than being obedient?
Are you comfortable only sharing Jesus with people you already know?
Would you be willing to initiate a conversation with someone you have never met?
When God gives you an opportunity to patiently invest in a relationship, are you willing to do that too?
You don't need to know exactly what God will do with a person. You don't need to produce a conversion. You need to be willing to obey when He gives you an opportunity.
Sometimes faithfulness looks like years of loving someone, listening to them and patiently sharing Jesus.
Sometimes faithfulness looks like stepping out of your comfort zone and starting a conversation with someone you have never met.
Sometimes it is both.
Pray for the people God has placed around you. Pray for the people you are yet to meet. Bring them before God. Ask Him to open doors. Watch for what He is doing. Then be ready to walk through the door when He gives you the opportunity. The next step is learning how to start conversations with people about Jesus.
FAQ - praying for unbelievers
How do I pray for an unbeliever?
Pray for them by name and be specific. Ask God to draw them to Jesus, open their heart, help them understand the gospel, and work through their circumstances. Ask Him to place faithful Christians around them and to give you an open door to speak (Colossians 4:2–4). Then pray for yourself - for love, wisdom, and courage - and watch for what God is doing.
What is a good prayer for the salvation of a loved one?
Keep it simple and honest: 'Father, You love [name] even more than I do. Please draw them to Jesus and open their eyes to who He really is. Help me love them patiently, give me wisdom to know when to speak, and courage when the moment comes. I trust them into Your hands.' You don't need perfect words - God knows your heart.
What Bible verses can I pray for lost family members?
Helpful passages include Romans 10:1 (Paul's prayer that people 'may be saved'), 1 Timothy 2:1–4 (God wants all people to be saved), Colossians 4:2–4 (praying for an open door), Ephesians 6:19–20 (praying for boldness), Matthew 9:36–38 (praying for workers), and 2 Corinthians 4:4–6 (asking God to shine the light of the gospel into blinded hearts).
How long should I keep praying for someone to be saved?
Keep praying for as long as God gives you breath and them life. Many Christians prayed for a family member or friend for years - sometimes decades - before seeing them come to faith. Jesus taught us to keep praying and not give up (Luke 18:1). If you're weary, ask God to renew your love for them, and remember that salvation is His work.
Is it my fault if someone I pray for doesn't become a Christian?
No. Scripture never says that someone remains unsaved because you didn't pray enough. Salvation belongs to God, and each person is responsible for their own response to Jesus. Your responsibility is faithfulness - to pray, love, serve, and speak when God gives you opportunity - and then to leave them in His hands.
Should I tell someone I'm praying for them?
Often, yes - if it's done with genuine care rather than as a hint that they need fixing. Offering to pray about a specific need, such as an illness or a job interview, is a kind and natural way to show love. Many people appreciate it, and it can open the door to a conversation about why you trust God.